Ode to Koozies
Oh koozie, you insulating castle,
enclosing my beverage, reducing my hassle.
Sometimes I get up, from watching TV
taking my beer to the kitchen with me.
A replay draws me back to the couch,
but my beer stays frosty in its neoprene pouch.
I harken back to a time of yore,
when the koozie was bulky foam beverage lore.
But now they’re delivered in heaps and piles
of koozies in myriad colors and styles.
The neoprene can model‘s my bread and butter,
it keeps my Bud Light so cold that I shudder,
every time I take a quick sip,
and my hand stays so dry the can never slips.
The zip-up neoprene is what I tote,
when cruising the river in my riverboat,
My slogan emblazoned in all of its glory:
“If this beer could talk, it’d tell you a story!”
Should ever I be caught with a naked can,
I wince as the moisture slides down my hand.
A beer sans koozie is a thought best unthunk,
but beer without one will still get you drunk!